The Perfect Run

The dragon cop let out a mighty roar, and the robber centurion answered with a spear to the eye.

Wyvern deflected the projectile with her scaled hand, the spear’s shaft snapping in half on impact. Determined to fight the LAW, Mars continued with his attacks, assisted by Sparrow. The Olympian and his accomplice launched javelins and lasers at the dragon above their head, while Mortimer outpaced them to chase after Ryan’s Plymouth Fury.

Wyvern, or Dragon Mom to friends, swiftly deflected the projectiles by zigzagging above buildings. Ryan watched her trying to find the right angle of attack, but she couldn’t open fire in a populated street. Unlike the Augusti, she wanted to avoid casualties.

A Private Security helicopter also joined the chase, though it was still too far away from the Plymouth for Ryan to identify the pilot. Probably nobody he knew.

“Take the wheel for a time,” Ryan said, as Mortimer gained ground on them. The hitman grabbed a shotgun from beneath his cloak, moving to the Plymouth’s right.

“You’re sure?” Felix asked, clearly uneasy at the idea. How couldn’t he be? Ryan’s car was a kingly throne on wheels, a sun that would burn the unworthy.

“I wasn’t talking to you, kitten,” the courier replied, as the car’s autopilot took over the driving wheel. Ryan moved to the backseat to get a better view, gun in hand, and aimed at his pursuer—after raising the right back window of course. “Stick to the baby seat.”

The courier froze time, and pulled the trigger. Ryan hoped that the hitman’s power wouldn’t work well in the frozen time, but to his frustration, the projectiles phased harmlessly through the criminal.

When time resumed, Mortimer closed in on the right, aimed at Felix, and pulled his shotgun’s trigger.

“Get down!” Ryan shouted, both he and his unwilling sidekick lowering their heads. The blast shattered the car’s front right window, but thankfully missed the passengers. The blowback almost tossed Mortimer off his motorcycle and forced him to pull back for a few seconds.

At this point, the Plymouth Fury left New Rome’s nightlife circuit and dashed into the Strip. Glitzy casinos and luminous establishments illuminated one side of the street like temples to consumerism, with hordes of gamblers, fixers, and players coming from all around Italy to worship them. The peaceful waters of the Mediterranean bordered artificial beaches and palm trees on the other side.

As the pursuit moved from narrow streets to a massive four-lane, Wyvern finally had the space to return fire. She unleashed a fireball at Mars and Sparrow from above, only for the former to summon a dozen medieval shields in midair. Dragon Mom’s projectile melted the steel wall, but her flames couldn’t hit the killers behind it.

Mars teleported a futuristic rocket launcher into the palm of his hand, which Ryan immediately recognized as Vulcan’s handiwork. The Olympian released a volley of fist-sized homing missiles at the dragon and forced her to blast them away in the skies.

The chase continued, the Plymouth Fury and its pursuers slaloming amidst other vehicles, moving from one lane to the other without rhyme or reason. While Wyvern and Mars fought one another, Sparrow and Mortimer focused on Ryan.

Swearing to protect his Plymouth Fury from all harm in his Perfect Run, the courier reloaded his gun, only to notice something rolling from below the backseat. A white-furred demon, smelling of antidepressants and gunpowder.

“How long have you been here?” Ryan asked, surprised.

The plushie didn’t respond, an empty revolver within reach of its paw.

“You’ve been playing Russian roulette in my car?” The time traveler glared at his wayward fiend. “The backseat is for love, not war!”

“Are you talking to a toy?” Felix asked while peeking over his broken window. He immediately lowered his head again to avoid a shotgun blast.

Ryan focused back on the car chase, and froze time again. Instead of firing at Mortimer himself though, he played dirty and targeted his vehicle’s wheels. The hitman couldn’t possibly keep his entire motorcycle intangible, or it would sink into the ground.

Ryan was right.

The bullets hit.

When time resumed, the motorcycle abruptly veered off course as its wheels deflated and threw its rider off its back. A surprised Mortimer phased through the ground as his vehicle crashed into a casino’s revolving door.

Ryan wondered if he would respawn like racing games contestants, but poor ol’ Mortimer didn’t come again.

Sparrow picked up the pace though. While Mars teleported Vulcan-made rounded bombs between himself and Wyvern to keep her at bay, Sparrow raised a hand in the Plymouth Fury’s direction. Thankfully, she looked far less experienced with a motorcycle than a Mercedes and had trouble aiming.

Ryan tried to shoot her, only to realize that his gun’s barrel was empty. He almost reloaded before a better idea crossed his mind.

“I always wanted to check something,” the time-traveler mumbled to himself, as he tossed his gun away.

His kitten at the front panicked. “Wait, what are you doing?”

“Upgrading my arsenal.” Ryan grabbed the Plushie with both hands, and to his relief, the depressed abomination didn’t cut them off on the spot. The Plushie didn’t say a word as the courier raised it Simba-style in Sparrow’s direction.

Ryan moved his thumbs behind the rabbit’s ears, and pushed.

The Plushie’s eyes unleashed a bright beam of light as its ears lowered, while Sparrow returned fire.

Two streams of energy collided amidst the four-lane. Now, having watched countless movies, Ryan expected a massive explosion, or for both beams to cancel each other out. Instead, they slightly undulated but still crossed through one another.

Unfortunately for Ryan, Sparrow’s laser hit his car’s roof and vaporized it, turning his Plymouth Fury into a convertible. The plushie’s gaze melted the concrete road and blew dust all over the four-lane, but the hitwoman managed to veer out of its path. A civilian’s Ferrari car drove off the road in an attempt to avoid the devastation, hitting a palm tree on a nearby beach.

“Dammit, not even a bright flash!” Ryan complained as he raised his thumbs, briefly stopping his assault.

At this point, the Private Security helicopter had caught up to the racers, its side gate opening to reveal a passenger. A beautiful Japanese woman in a tight, blue costume with a badge and a hat.

Wardrobe, in a fabulous traffic cop uniform. The Law had never looked so good.

Ryan watched on with fascination as she brought a whistle to her lips and used it. Almost all vehicles in the vicinity shone with a golden glow, as Wardrobe asserted her authority. Sparrow’s motorcycle, Mars’ own bike, civilians’ cars, and even bicycles, all abruptly stopped in the middle of the road.

The Plymouth Fury’s autopilot still worked though, callously violating traffic laws. Soon, it left its pursuers behind in the dust.

“She can search me anytime,” Ryan said as he looked at Wardrobe with longing. He immediately beat himself over it. Must… stay… faithful… to my First Lady! He imagined Livia in a cop costume slamming him against his car’s hood, and it solved the issue.

Wyvern immediately fell down on the Augusti like a falcon on doves, barring their way. Sparrow took a tail swipe to chest and ended the race face-first on the ground.

Mars, meanwhile, leaped from his vehicle and switched his rocket launcher with a thermal lance. As he jumped within ten meters of Wyvern, he immediately summoned bombs inside the dragon’s throat, her neck expanding like a toad’s.

It didn’t kill her. It didn’t even behead her, as her throat contained the blast. If anything, Wyvern looked more pissed than hurt as flames came out of her maw and nostrils.

Her enormous hand reached for Mars, the thermal lance snapping as it impacted her thick scales. Her claws almost closed on the Olympian, but a shockwave propelled him upward above the road and let him slip through his foe’s grasp.

Ryan watched on with confusion as the flying Mars materialized a shield while in midair beneath his feet. A new shockwave erupted around his boots, pushing both the Genome and his shield into different directions. Wyvern attempted to catch the escaping Caporegime with her fangs, but he quickly summoned swords inside her eyes in response. Dragon Mom let out a roar of pain as a fountain of blood flowed down on her face. Mars used repeated shockwaves to leave his foe in his dust and pursue the Plymouth Fury.

The courier quickly realized what was happening. Mars was teleporting pressurized air beneath his iron boots, and the blowback propelled him forward.

Wardrobe’s helicopter flew down to intercept the centurion wannabe, while Wyvern’s eyes seemed to partly regenerate from the damage. Unfortunately, Mars reacted faster than the heroes. He summoned bombs close to the Private Security helicopter, destroying two of the blades and cracking the windshield.

Wardrobe almost fell off her vehicle as it spiraled towards the ground. Wyvern immediately moved to catch it with two hands, while holding Sparrow prisoner by squeezing the hitwoman with her tail. Wardrobe managed to hang on to Ryan’s relief.

However, the Dynamis reinforcements remained behind, leaving Mars to pursue the Plymouth Fury unmolested. The Olympian used repeated shockwaves to ‘jump’ in the air, summoning shields to orient himself.

“Kitten, we aren’t shaking off your daddy issues just yet,” he warned his sidekick, before pushing the Plushie’s ears. The rabbit unleashed a beam of energy at Mars, but the Olympian zigzagged between the waterfront and the casino to dodge.

Unfortunately, the centurion seemed to have run out of conventional weapons to launch, and he moved on to bigger stuff. He dropped a Renault Espace French car on the four-lane, and though the damaged Plymouth Fury avoided a collision, the impact blasted part of the walkway to pieces.

Mars then teleported a Japanese truck, but the Plushie’s baleful laser glare blasted it to pieces. Deciding to cheat, Ryan froze time and had the rabbit demon blast a paralyzed Olympian mid-flight. The beam tossed Mars back when time resumed, but the man swiftly switched the damaged parts of his armor with spare ones and continued the chase.

At this point, Felix grabbed the gun which Ryan had previously dropped and found bullets to reload it with in the glovebox. Atom Kitten tried to support the courier with suppressing fire, but his aim was terrible.

“Have you ever used a gun?” the courier asked, as Mars ‘jumped’ behind a luxury hotel on the strip. Ryan raised his thumbs, causing the Plushie to turn its head at him with an unhappy, non-lethal gaze. “You couldn’t shoot an elephant in a corridor!”

“I’m doing my best, alright!” Felix complained, before noticing a new motorcycle entering the four-lane from their right. A man riding with a woman holding him by the chest. Though both wore helmets, Felix immediately recognized them. “Jamie and Ki-jung.”

Were they friends or foes though?

Police sirens echoed as Private Security patrol Humvees passed by the Plymouth Fury on the other side of the lane, veering to avoid the burning wrecks Mars left in his wake. Augusti guards in power armor emerged from the casinos to watch the chase, mesmerized. Both sides looked confused, perhaps due to a breakdown of communication from their hierarchy.

In any case, it made the courier’s task easier. By trying to keep the hit on Atom Cat relatively quiet, the Olympians had neglected to inform their mooks. Most were too confused to chase after Ryan and Felix, and it would take time for them to mobilize.

Still, the duo needed to escape the city before Lightning Butt climbed down from his mountain and took things into his own hands.

“Shortie!” Ryan shouted, as Mars reappeared above them. “Shortie?!”

“I’m here!” Her voice came out of the chronoradio. Ryan glanced at the beach, and to his relief noticed the tower of the Mechron submarine peeking above the water. “To your left!”

Ryan quickly noticed a pleasure pier splitting the beach like a dagger, three hundred meters from their location. Two yachts were anchored on each side, sitting in the waters. “Put on your seatbelt,” the courier ordered his sidekick as he moved back on the driver’s seat and took over the wheel. The Plushie sat on his lap. “I hope you love action movie sequences.”

Felix immediately understood what he had in mind. “We can’t leave the city!”

“Trust me, kitten, it’s for your sake,” Ryan said, before focusing on the Chronoradio and the road ahead. “Shortie, we’ll jump from the pier in two minutes. Open the back.”

His second favorite cat didn’t like the plan. “My sisters—”

“One of them is a serial lottery winner, and both are under Livia’s protection,” Ryan replied as Jamie’s motorcycle slowly caught up to them. “They’ll be fine.”

“You knew,” Felix said, clenching his fists. “She saw this happen. It’s another of her plans.”

“One that involves sparing your l—”

Ryan didn’t finish his sentence, as Mars switched strategies. He launched two spiked chains more than twenty meters in length from his hands, each with a grappling hook at the end. One embedded itself in the car hood, the other in the trunk.

The Olympian had harpooned the car like a whale!

Ryan immediately froze time, lifted his Plushie, and pushed the ears down. The wily rabbit raised its forepaws in excitement as it opened fire on the chain grappling the car hood. The beam melted the links, but time resumed before the courier could turn around and sever the second link. Mars landed on the ground while manifesting a shield beneath his feet, waterskiing on the concrete. This slowed the Plymouth Fury considerably, and gave the Olympian time to maneuver.

“Kitten, blow the chain at the back!” Ryan ordered as he hastily seized the driving wheel. The courier still had a short cooldown to take into account, and he didn’t trust the autopilot to make a risky maneuver.

“I’ll try!” Felix replied, moving to the car’s back as the vehicle escaped the four-lane and turned towards the pier. The hero tried to reach for the chain with one hand, but had to lower himself to avoid a flying knife from his father. Mars started to pull himself toward the Plymouth Fury, using both hands to move up the chain while launching small kitchen tools. He even attempted to target the car’s wheels, but Ryan wisely had them reinforced against such tactics.

Unfortunately, if Mars moved within ten meters of the car, then he could manifest a weapon beneath the car and immobilize it. Ryan’s car could take a lot of punishment, but it had its limits.

Worse, Jamie and his girlfriend had outpaced their boss. The new Mercury had manifested a sword of shining red light in his hands, and reached the Plymouth Fury’s trunk. Felix looked at his old friend’s visor, while he raised his sword to cut him down.

“Jamie,” Ryan heard Felix whisper. “Don’t, please.”

Jamie hesitated for a split second, before he briefly glanced at his girlfriend behind him. She said something Ryan couldn’t hear due to the wind in his face, but whatever it was, her fiancé reached a decision.

Jamie’s shining sword swiftly fell down, and Mars’ chains snapped in half.

The surprised Olympian lost control of his momentum and slipped off his shield, falling on his right leg with a sickening crack noise so loud that half of New Rome must have heard it. He rolled on the ground, but had the presence of mind to try and skewer Jamie. The rebellious Augusti managed to move his motorcycle safely to the left, right as metal spikes manifested where he used to be.

Right as Mars finished his crash landing, rats emerged by the hundreds from manholes and the road’s sewage system. The centurion attempted to teleport items to protect himself, but the horde quickly buried him alive beneath their furred mass.

Jamie gave a shocked Felix a nod, and then fled in the city’s direction while Ryan drove his car on the pier. The Plymouth Fury seemed to screech as it drove between yachts, Len’s submarine rising from the waves three dozen meters away.

Metal plates opened on the colossal underwater vehicle’s back, revealing a platform meant for transporting Mechron’s mechs. Shortie waited on it, anxiously looking at her best friend with a water rifle in hands.

“They… they helped us?” Atom Cat whispered to himself.

“You should treat your true friends better,” Ryan said, as they reached the pier’s end. “Seatbelt!”

Felix hastily grabbed the one on the backseat, while the Plushie kindly put on Ryan’s seatbelt. The courier briefly froze time to calculate the right angle, before smashing the accelerator when it resumed.

The Plymouth Fury reached the pier’s edge, and flew.

Without a roof and most windows broken, Ryan took the sea wind in the face, while the Plushie raised its forepaws in happiness. The courier immediately realized he wouldn’t make it, as the distance between the submarine and the pier was too great.

The yachts’ windows shattered, the glass shards forming a flying landing ramp.

With it, the Plymouth Fury landed on the submarine’s open platform, turned half clockwise, and parked itself. The shock was so abrupt that Felix’s seatbelt almost snapped under the pressure, while the Plushie happily bounced off the driving wheel.

When at long last his car had stopped moving, Ryan let out a sigh. The poor Plymouth Fury had been ravaged beyond words, its roof destroyed, its hood full of holes.

“Sorry to be late,” Shroud replied above Ryan, not even bothering to disguise his voice. The sharp edge of his glass costume became visible, simmering under the moonlight. “I had to get my girlfriend to safety.”

“How long have you been here?” Ryan asked with a frown.

“I caught up to you at the pier.” The vigilante crossed his hands. “I guess luck was on my side.”

Such a bad pun, and yet so appropriate.

“Riri, you’re alright?” Len asked while immediately rushing to his side.

“I’m fine,” the courier replied, before glancing at New Rome. “We won the race.”

As the submarine moved away from New Rome’s shores, Ryan noticed Pluto parking her car on the pier, escorted by Augusti guards on motorcycles. The Augusti’s Underboss glared at the submarine as it swam away, the platform’s roof closing in preparation for the vehicle to dive beneath the waves.

As for the Strip, Ryan had left a few fires in his wake. He wondered how the situation would evolve after this. Things hadn’t escalated to a full war between Dynamis and the Augusti yet, but this fight had been very public. Ryan hoped that Livia could smooth things over, but the situation didn’t look optimal at all.

One creature didn’t hide its joy though.

“I love you so much!” The Plushie rose to its feet to observe the chaos while the glow of the strip’s flames reflected in its soulless blue eyes. They kept shining even as the submarine’s roof fully closed.

Nothing better than mindless destruction to cure depression.